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  • Writer's pictureSati

How are you with changes?


How is it for you when you feel something has ended and a new beginning is not yet there?

Is it terrifying? Frightening? Do you feel shaky or are you confident and trusting? Do you go into the survival fight or flight mode or do you stay, feeling what's there? How do you deal with the unknown? When I decided to trust my inner guidance and leave the old and known for the new and unknown I didn't really know where am I going, I just knew that I didn't want to be where I was anymore. I imagined how it would feel to change, to choose differently and I tried to picture out my decision by imagining two different roads in front of me. On the right there was the old one and on the left the new one, and I was on the crossing and I had to choose which one to take. I walked the right one, and I was very observing of how it felt to me to be there, my body was tired, I felt exhausted, no energy, bored and the environment around felt gray and dark. Then I tried to imagine the new one, I started walking that one and there was light and lightness, and I enjoyed my walk, I felt freedom! My body was full of energy and I felt I can simply do anything. I had no clear idea of what to do there but it felt beautiful, joyful, bright. And that was what occurred to me, to make my choice. I needed to imagine. I needed to feel. I needed to trust that whatever will happen, it's going to be OK. I needed to trust that it's OK not to know. It's OK to be in a space in between. It's OK to have no idea what's next.

I had a chat with a friend of mine the other day, she said she feels something has ended in her and that she feels scared because she does not know which was the next step to take. I suggested her to just be in the space in-between, to allow herself to relax there and to check how it was for her to allow herself to not know. And she felt immediately better. She could relax.

We live in a world, where not knowing is considered a weakness. When you are asked for something and you say that you don't know, people label you and no matter which the area. Could be work as relationships. You feel judged and you take that labelling and judgments as truth, you start believing you should do better, you start believing that who you are is just not enough. That's how we were grown up, that's how the whole world seems to work. How could you not know?! The thing is that's bullshit. Very few people in this world truly know who they are, what's their purpose, what are they here to do. What's the next step. Many just act in terms of consequences. I studied medicine for years, so a natural consequence for it is I will become a doctor (I did not study medicine, it was just an example :)) And you talk with them and you realize they are passionate of things that has nothing to do with medicine at all!! It may take years to feel what do you want to do, it may take time to know what's the next step to take, and we are all in a hurry. And we don't allow ourselves to explore, try different things, because changing is considered being a looser, or that something went wrong or whatever. Changing is considered not having a clear idea, and it's for sure bad. And let me ask you.

Are you 100% sure that the ideas you have and the choices you made are truly yours?

Just asking, because if we don't allow ourselves time to feel, time to connect with our true nature, with our inner, time to relax in the emptiness we feel and if we are just running for an answer....and better for it to be quick, I wonder from where are our decisions coming from?

We really never know what's next, that's life, if it would be so predictable it would not be that fun!

But we can know how we feel about a certain thing or another, we can know how is our body affected by this or that other situation and this is the criterion. If we let our reasoning aside for a few minutes and if we just connect with our body and our feelings we would arrive to our genuine answer. We just need to trust the process.

Love,

Sati

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